First appearance: S3E7 — Severed Limbs — Cress v Chedrick McDougan · watch it on YouTube
Chedrick McDougan is a swaggering, double-blade-swinging champion who sounds like a college football coach and greets everyone as a peasant. He arrived with one goal, to take his opponent’s shoes, and settled for taking her feet. His bout with Cress became one of the Void’s great limb-swapping farces. He won it with a spinning penguin and then threw a water bottle at the Grandmaster’s face, which is why she left him behind in The Shadowlands.
Story
The Arbiter summoned Chedrick into the kitchen of The Dread Fortress, where the Grandmaster was assembling a pre-show charcuterie board. He opened with “Greetings, you peasants,” promised to take the shoes of anyone in his way, and adjusted the plan without missing a beat when Cress pointed out she was barefoot. He tried the rat slices, which the Grandmaster assured him were definitely Master Splinter. When Cress called the meat gamey, the Grandmaster stomped off in a tantrum, kicking over a goblin and spilling the charcuterie across the floor, and Chedrick declared, “I like her, even though I gotta take her shoes. Or her feet.” He then stumbled out of the gate in the opening moments, and when the Thunder Twins’ lightning struck him, he answered by announcing that he lives in the water and breathes thunder and lightning. In S3E7 — Severed Limbs — Cress v Chedrick McDougan, his second swing with the double blade tore into Cress for a critical hit, and a follow-up longsword shot at her ankle took off her left pinky toe.
Things went sideways when a chaos spell bound the two champions hand in hand. Cress hacked halfway through Chedrick’s held hand, his strong hand, and when The Acolytes summoned The Box of Chaos, he used his “pimp hand” to drag her over to it. He introduced his penguin, Fear, and bought a gift from Gerald with a box of grapes and two apples. The gift was a Mind Blade, a psychic sword forged by Mind Flayers. Chedrick cried “I can see the future!”, tried to read a mind, latched onto the dead eel in Cress’s pocket instead, and stabbed Gerald by accident. Gerald clawed him in the thigh for it. Soon after, Cress finished the job on his hand, which spilled bright silver “T-1000” blood across the ground, and tried to slap him with it; the blows missed, but one splattered his silver blood across his face. Undaunted, Chedrick strapped the Mind Blade to his stump, climbed her rock as “the bungee cord,” and lopped off her foot: “You take my hand. I take your foot.”
His worst fear turned out to be heights. A Boggart hoisted him thirty feet into the air like a cheerleader, and he ran right off it. He broke his fall by landing on Cress’s severed foot, which he had picked up for exactly that purpose (“I’d rather crack hers than mine”). Gerald, still sore about being stabbed, threw Cress a healing potion. When Cress fed Chedrick’s hand to the box and got a ninth-level healing scroll that regrew her foot, Chedrick answered by tossing the now-useless souvenir foot into the box. Gerald traded it for his hand back, plus a sewing kit. Chedrick stitched the hand on the right way round, but it was weak, and Gerald’s shadowy fingers puppeted it into slapping him hard enough to leave a mark. When his Boggart lifted him again, he jumped off again of his own accord. Against the shadow ghast the Arbiter conjured, Chedrick hid so perfectly that, having bled so much, he just looked like a silvery background. He then gave himself away by shouting at the creature that it couldn’t see him. His attempt to seize its mind with the Mind Blade also failed, and it threw him out with a psychic jolt.
After the Grandmaster banished the ghast and demanded a real fight, Chedrick tried to intimidate Cress, failed, and peed himself a little: “a little trickle goes down your pant leg.” The Grandmaster promised him new pants if he survived. He charged anyway and landed two clean hits with the double blade. In the final clash of ultimate moves, Cress called down a “heaven of dawn” beam that turned the rock around him to lava. Chedrick spun ten times and launched Fear as a super spinning penguin drill, which became a gray blur of fire. Fear punched straight through the beam and through Cress, leaving a penguin-sized hole in her stomach and winning Chedrick the match by ten points. When the Grandmaster held out her hand to him, Chedrick threw a water bottle that hit her in the face. “Fine. Have it your way,” she said, granted him his wish, and clapped everyone back to the kitchen. She left Chedrick behind in the Shadowlands.
Personality and Abilities
Chedrick is all bluster and volume. He calls everyone a peasant, takes every jab personally, and has the energy of a coach pacing the sideline. He admits he has “no wisdom,” and it shows: he hits the box that is helping him, talks to monsters that cannot see him, and leaps off things despite being afraid of heights. He is built for strength and stamina rather than sense. He fights with a double-bladed scimitar, a longsword and hand axes, swings twice in a breath, can catch a second wind to heal mid-fight, and can surge into a sudden burst of extra attacks. He bleeds liquid silver, which he calls “vibranium color” and “fifty shades of gray blood.”
His constant companion is Fear, a penguin who “fears nobody.” Fear won over the crowd when Doug the Pug bounced his die to the penguin’s feet and Fear rolled high, which set off a chant, a parade and a conga line through the stands. Fear also doubles as Chedrick’s ultimate weapon. After the match Chedrick insisted he had barely powered up and warned that next time he’d bring out his “super whirlwind for explosion number five.” At the table, his player revealed it was his first time ever playing D&D, and that the whole shoes-and-feet vendetta began as a plan to take the Jordans of Cress’s player.
Relationships
- Cress: His opponent. They swapped a toe, a hand and a foot before Fear drilled through her.
- Fear: His penguin partner, crowd favorite, and the business end of the super spinning penguin drill.
- Gerald: Sold him the Mind Blade for fruit, got stabbed by it, then traded his hand back and cursed it to slap him.
- The Grandmaster: Promised him new pants, then abandoned him in the Shadowlands after he hit her with a water bottle.
- The Arbiter: Summoned him, and wondered aloud who had nicknamed him “the bungee cord” and why they hated him.
Memorable Quotes
“Well, I guess I’ll be taking your feet then.” (S3E7)
“I am the bungee cord. My legs will take me anywhere I need to go.” (S3E7)
- “His name is Fear, and he fears nobody.” (S3E7)
- “I am a professional box hitter, what you expect?” (S3E7)
- “You take my hand. I take your foot. My nubs.” (S3E7)
- “I got the penguin for a reason.” (S3E7)